FOTD XIV - Drunk Belligerent Woman vs Asshole Taxi Driver

After picking up at Excalibur and dropping off down far southwest, I took a radio call (for a chick called Aicia - AyeSeeYa?)that got me back on the other side of the freeway and hopefully on the way back to the strip.

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When I get within five minutes of the destination I usually call and let them know to expect me. This time I called twice and got voice mail each time (usually means they canceled or got another ride somehow) so I turned around and called into the dispatch that I was pulling off and dead heading back to the strip. However after I did that, I again flipped a bitch and headed towards the address (since it was 400am figured it was possible she still needed a ride).

As I pull up to her street I see this beautiful young blond woman sitting in the dark, on the curb with her luggage so I stop by her and load her up. She gets in
-Where to?
I need to get to Los Angeles.
-You going to the airport?
I need to rent a car.
-Ok, I can take you to the rental car shuttles at the airport.
I need to get to Los Angeles.
At this point I realize she is pretty close to being shit face drunk, still I like to engage my passengers in some nice small talk...
-Do you live in Los Angeles?
I go to UCLA Law School.
-Oh cool, Hey did anyone stop and try to pick you up while you were sitting on the street corner?
I just need to get to Los Angeles. I'm going to rent a car.
-Why don't you buy a plane ticket, it's a long drive.
I need to get to LA.
ANYWAY.. it turns out that she just got into a heated fight with her 'old man' and got the F out of there ASAP. She was drunk off her ass and I recommended that maybe she get a hotel and try to fly out when she wakes up, but she insists that she wants to rent a car and drive back ASAP. For the most part the conversation is cordial and I feel we're getting along well enough. We arrive at the airport and the fare is $20.30..
-Ok, we're here, just take this shuttle bus to the rental cars and they can help you out. It's $20.30
WHAT THE FUCK? HOW MUCH IS IT?
-Twenty dollars and thirty cents. I took you the most direct route, Maryland to Warm Springs to the 215 to the airport exit.
So I pop out and open her door and get her luggage out. In the meantime I tap on the shuttle bus window (who just dropped off some passengers at the airport) and let the driver know that I have one for the ride back. He acknowledges it and waits along with me while she sits in the van digging through her purse. She finally gets out and places her purse on the hood of the van while continuing to dig through it.
-I told the driver that you are going to go with him to the rental car place.
How much is it again?
-$20.30
She addresses the shuttle driver.
I need to get to Los Angeles, does this bus go to LA?
SD: No lady, this is a shuttle bus. If you want to go to LA you need to go downtown and catch the Greyhound.
How much is it to downtown?
-Like twenty more dollars. And you already owe me $20.30.
She finds her money, the shuttle bus driver takes off.. she asks again how much it is, this time being annoyed and thinking she is a broke ass drunk, I say twenty dollars and thirty cents PLUS tip!
TIP? Maybe if you charged me less I would give you a tip.
With my hand out she counts out all the money she seems to have in her purse and it's 2 $5's and 10 $1's for $20 exactly.
-I took you the most direct way, how can I charge you less, I took you to the airport so you can rent a car.
FUCK YOU!!
At this point what can I do except get away ASAP, she continues to dig through her purse to dig out the $.30.
-Lady, please get your purse off of my van.
Fuck you asshole
-Forget the $.30, get your purse off of my van NOW.
She does and walks towards the curb.
-GET A ROOM YOU ARE DRUNK!
She flips me off as she walks away. It was a pretty funny scene. I do not know what happened to her after I left. As for me, I went over to the arrivals and waited (first in line) for someone to take back to the strip. For 75 minutes I waited until this couple came out (they saw their friends off at the airport) and I took them to Paris. By now it's real slow on the strip, so as I left Paris I was driving towards Bally's when this guy who's sitting on a wall yells as I drive by, I pull over into the Bally's driveway, he along with two friends run me down I roll down the window and he asks. . .

"ARE THERE ANY STRIP CLUBS OPEN RIGHT NOW?"

So I took the three to Rhino, yo.